Joke: The Prophet

I had tried every means to succeed in life, but to no avail. One day I decided to visit a prophet. The prophet promised to deliver me but I had to pay 15,000 Naira. I went and borrowed the money from my uncle. Next day, I handed the 15,000 Naira to the prophet.

After many minutes of speaking in tongues, the prophet said, “Young man, your mother-in-law is a witch and she is the cause of your problems.” Surprised, I replied, “Ahhhh! But I’m not married!” After another round of speaking in tongues, he said, “Error, error, you did not pull off your shoes outside.” I went outside and pulled off my shoes.

The prophet asked, “But do you have a stepmother?” I replied, “Yes.” After the third round of speaking in tongues, he said, “Yes, yes, yes! Your stepmother covered your destiny inside a pot and hid it under her bed. Go home and break the pot!” I got angry and pulled off my shirt. “Wait, wait, wait! What is that for?” The prophet asked.

Angrily, I replied, “Give me back my 15,000 Naira or else we will both die here!” The prophet retorted, “Meaning?” I replied, “Because my stepmother died before my father married my mother!”